Fix My Leads

http://media.www.thehornettribune.com/media/storage/paper894/news/2008/03/08/UniversityNews/Higher.Education-3272517.shtml

“More than 2,000 students and supporters of higher education assembled in front of the Alabama State House for the Higher Education Partnership’s annual Higher Education Day rally.”

Supporters of higher education assembled in front of the Alabama State House for the Higher Education Partnership’s annual Higher Education Day rally.

I had to get rid of the number of supporters since it wasn’t specific and the amount did not make the story.

http://media.www.thechanticleeronline.com/media/storage/paper670/news/2008/04/17/News/Jsu-Board.Raises.Tuition.Housing.Prices-3329651.shtml

“On Monday, April 14, the Jacksonville State University Board of Trustees decided, in a unanimous vote on Resolution 515, to increase tuition for the first time in two years. . The fee required when applying to JSU is also increasing from $20 to $30.”

The Jacksonville State University Board of Trustees unanimously voted Monday on Resolution 515 to increase the tuition for the first time in two years.

Undergraduate tuition will shoot up 12.4 percent and graduate courses by 11 percent. The university’s graduate and undergraduate distance learning courses will undergo a $50 per credit hour increase, and the cost of residence housing will shoot up 15 percent.

The lead was too long and gave to day and date in the same sentence when issue in the same week.

Give Me Leads, Or Make Them Better!

http://media.www.guilfordian.com/media/storage/paper281/news/2008/04/04/News/Pelcher.Hamdan.Vormelker.And.Kennedy.Take.Senate.Election-3304945.shtml

“We want Senate to work for you! To accomplish this, Senate needs an Executive Council with experience making change at Guilford.”

This example of a quote lead is poor and lacks quality of information about the topic. It leads me to believe that the upcoming portions of writing will deliver reasons that the Executive Council has not made changes and show the lack of experience in the current Council. I would put a more upfront type of lead here.

http://media.www.sdsucollegian.com/media/storage/paper484/news/2008/04/09/News/Robert.Burns.Bows.Out-3313053.shtml

“He is a passionate man,” said the Students’ Association vice president and junior political science major Eric Hanson. “He cares about his students, and it comes across.”

“That passionate man is Dr. Robert Burns, head of the Political Science and History Department and the dean of the Honors College, who will retire at the end of the academic year.”

SDSU’s front page story about Dr. Robert Burns, gives him a sort of supernatural feeling. It gives me the feeling of a Superhero lead. In addition, this man they build up so much isn’t introduced so smoothly. I would like to introduce him earlier and then list his credentials.

http://media.www.thebakerorange.com/media/storage/paper1028/news/2008/04/11/Entertainment/Reading.Series.Wraps.Up.With.Poetry-3317626.shtml

“The culmination of the Baker reading series took place Tuesday night. About 35 students and faculty members attended.

Instructor of English Marti Mihalyi launched the reading by introducing students and acknowledging presenters unable to attend. The reading consisted of six students, and Mihalyi said she could have included more.”

Overall, I believe this is a below average lead. The number of students and faculty who attended where not important. The story wasn’t made more or less important because 35 students and faculty members attended. It also failed to notify me of what the readings were about and why there was a gathering. Instead, they continued to tell me about students who weren’t able to attend and how it was great to hear what Baker students had to say.

That was an example of what I call ” The Really Not Important Lead.” There was no description or anything detailed being told.

http://media.www.theeagleonline.com/media/paper666/sections/20080410TheScene.html

“Most students are cowed by the immensity of gender-based violence in the East Congo. Their eyes glaze over and their stomachs drop as they sort through the complexity.”

This lead pulls me towards the question of ” well how many is most?” It shows no survey and gives no direct number of students that are “cowed” by the immensity of gender-based violence. It goes along with the “Many (Some) Student” leads that are put out there.

http://media.www.thehilltoponline.com/media/storage/paper590/news/2008/04/11/LifeStyle/The-Fashion.Bomb-3319934.shtml

“All fashion writer Claire Sulmers wanted to do was put together an online portfolio of her fashion clips to keep from hauling around a portfolio to interviews, but she wound up with a lot more than she bargained for.

“I didn’t want to at first,” Sulmers said. “I had heard that some professionals got fired from their jobs for keeping online journals.”

This lead tells me nothing about why she it was more than she bargained for. In fact, I have no idea if it was meant as a good or bad thing until late in the story. I will take the pleasure of naming this lead “Get to the point.” Poor display of tone and meaning are written all over this lead.

Lesson Learned!

Over the duration of my MC202 class I’ve taken in a great deal of knowledge for media writing. It takes a great deal to accurately write for the media. Every detail is important and every aspect will be under the microscope. Credibility seems to be the main factor when it comes to the journalistic style of writing. From sources to accuracy, everything comes into play when accounting for the facts your writing. Nothing can easily be put together or looked over. Punctuation can also damage the credibility of your work. I was taught to focus on every aspect and play close detail to where certain things are placed in a sentence.

If taken correctly, the outcome of the class can help advance the overall writing skills of any individual that takes it. Learning the AP style of writing and seeing how many different versions of writing styles that are out in the public opens up different types of viewpoints from a writing aspect. The quality of work, along with the style of work is important for different environments and locations in the United States. Although I haven’t gotten everything down perfectly, I hope I can continue to improve on this style of writing.

Since January, I have improved in certain areas and struggled in others, but the field of writing still interests me. Learning about the process daily papers or magazines go through has furthered my enthusiasm about becoming a writer. Certainly there has been a lot of resources at my disposal for the media purposes and I intend to continue with what I already know and hopefully grow even more as a writer and student. The class has been a big help in deciding my field of study throughout college.

Kari Luckett, Behind The Scenes

Name: Kari Luckett

Age: 21

Location: Edwardsville, IL

She is one who aspires to own a multiplex type of gym. YES! She will one day operate out of a building that puts a gym, spa and dance studio together as one. This twenty-one year old Mass Communication major at Southern Illinois University-Edwardsville has determined early in life that her passion was “to succeed!” “I wanted to do business, but I hated math, that’s why I chose Mass Comm.” Currently she passes time by exercising, working and having a little personal time with her boyfriend, who she has been on and off with for a little over three years now. When asked why she chose SIUE as her place of furthering her education she responded “my dad works here, so I get half off.” Her dad wasn’t the only one who has made an impact on her life. She has two brothers and a sister, an older brother, an older sister and a twin brother. Her sister has been the biggest influence throughout her life. When faced with the question of her goals for her college years Kari simply stated, ” to complete college.” With her bright smile and reminiscent expressions she disclosed her most memorable moments of her life. “Singing the National Anthem at the minor league Gateway Grizzles game, and going down-state for soccer.” Her high school experience weren’t the best days she explains, “My early years of high school were fun, but I was mischievous and got into much trouble. I began to hate high school my junior year because all my friends had graduated or were about to, which left me with just my few close friends.” So Kari buckled down and graduated early. This really shows the passion and determination to finish what she starts. Her favorite quote, ” life is too short to be angry” and this is definitely something she lives by. Her dream destination of residence is Charleston, South Carolina, because of the rich cultures and dynamic location. Its seems her happy-go-lucky attitude is brought out in personal conversations and it shows in her work, beliefs and aspirations. Whether it’s sports, school, work or just her personal life, she has clearly demonstrated the necessities towards becoming what she has always dreamed to become.

Inverted Pyramids Stories and Summary Leads

http://www.alestlelive.com/media/storage/paper351/news/2008/01/29/News/Stabbing.Arrests.Occur.On.Party.Bus-3172423.shtml

The importance of this lead is clearly meant to show the danger through the form of proximity. No names are used in the lead because this doesn’t help the magnify the lead in any way. There is no attributed information because they are not disclosing anything that a witness or official has reported. The time and date are a factor due to the time period in which the story was released. Something that magnifies the story’s lead is the amount of people that were arrested as well as the stabbing being the main focus of the story.

http://www.stltoday.com/stltoday/news/stories.nsf/stlouiscitycounty/story/BFC9D1B6437D747B862573DF00151CF9?OpenDocument?referrer=delicious

The story’s lead is one of impact. One name is used in the lead and is accredited along with  a comment along the lines of the State trooper losing his job. The source is identified as state Rep. Jay Hoffman. The lead could have been constructed better because it is not the type of lead that makes you want to read more. If you have no true interest in a car crash then you most likely wont read on. The writer made the main point of his lead the car crash instead of two sisters that died.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/chi-mcdonald_28_bothjan28,0,1990471.story

I have no clue what this lead focuses on. My guess would be novelty, but the lack of information and unknown name would stop me from reading any further. I have no clue whether this is about the mother being haunted or her son’s murderer still on the loose. More information needs to be stated as well as the assumption that she has been haunted for the last two months. Regardless of any circumstances the facts are left out of the lead and left up to interpretation. I don’t think this is even a summary lead.

http://www.baltimoresun.com/entertainment/bal-al.juno27jan27,0,7344744.story

This lead shows a much different style than the rest. It has that name that many songwriters, movie-goers and parents may be able to relate to. This lead is set to play on emotions. It sets the mood right with the mentioning of food, drinks and entertainment. Although there is no attribution anywhere, the lead is full of excitement and even gives the location for local preferences.

Accuracy, The Key To A Writers Future!

The importance of obtaining true knowledge about a subject or its creative parts and meaning. For a writer the comprehension of misspelled words, misused phrases or comma abuse can be the difference between a job or hobby. The advancement of this knowledge is key in the deciding factor of what’s correct and what’s opinion.

Writing for the media calls for great care and trust in the subjects we write about. The relationship between sources and its content are admired and respected with the utmost honesty. Often, this connection is broken between the two, causing and inconsistent pattern of information.

The incorrect spelling of names, titles and occupations can be deadly to a writer’s credibility. If such a simple mistake can be deemed harmful, then readers will often wonder what other information can be scrambled or incorrect. The ability of writer will be in question along with any other of the previous content placed into the media’s hands. Such a mistake should be avoided at all costs.

Consequently, for young and upcoming writers steps should be taken to prevent these actions. A failing grade in a course that teaches these rules would only be the correct action. If this type of mistake destroys ones credibility, then why allow anybody to get to the level to make that mistake? This justifies Prof. Speere’s grading policy on factual errors.

The content of story must be accurate to properly display information for the media. If in any situation this doesn’t occur, then the story is now invalid. The whole purpose for a writer is to gather the correct information and facts about the stories we cover, if accuracy is a problem then that defeats the whole purpose of a writer.

Tom Brady, The Best QB Ever?

With the anticipation of the ultimate season at hand the only question left to define the legacy of a career that has not yet come to an end is, “Is he the best quarterback ever?” The he I am referring to is none other of course than Tom Brady. With three Superbowl rings already obtained and a fourth so close that they are already sizing his finger for, the question is almost obvious. Just look at the statistics that he is up against.

Dan Marino started his career in 83′ and it came to an end in 99′. Had five season in which he threw for over 4000 yards, one of which he threw for 5000+. Two of his earlier years, the 84-85 season and the 86-87 season he threw for the two highest TD amounts total for his career, 48 and 44. He had two 30 touchdown seasons and the rest are below 28. In the last 10 years of his career he wasn’t able to throw for more than 17 touchdowns once! One of which he threw for 9 TD’s in 13 games total. He ended his career with 420 TD’s and 252 Int’s. He played in 242 games and started 240 of them. He has had 9 pro-bowl selections and was an 8-time All-pro.

John Elway, who threw for multiple 3000 yard seasons, only was able to post one 4000 yard season. He never threw for more than 27 TD’s in a season and finished with 300 overall TD’s to 226 Int’s. He never played less than 11 games in his 16 year career. Elway was a 9-time pro bowler and 5-time All-pro.

Joe Montana never had a 4000+ yard passing season. His career high touchdown mark was 31 in the 87′-88′ season. He finished his career with 273 TD’s and 130 Int’s. Disregarding the three seasons in which he played under 10 games in each, Montana has never played any less than 11 in any of the other 12 seasons. He was an 8-time pro bowler and 7-time All-pro

In Johnny Unitas’s 18 year career he never amounted a 4000+ yard season either. 32 was his career high for touchdowns, and he had three seasons in the later part of his career in which he played under 10 games.  He finished his career with 290 TD’s and 253 Int’s. There were nine seasons in which he threw more interceptions than touchdowns. He was a 10-time pro bowler and 9-time All-pro.

Tom Brady has never thrown less than 18 TD’s in a year. His career high is 50 in which he set in the 2007-08 season. He has thrown for two 4000+ yard seasons and has only played eight seasons. He currently has 197 TD’s and 86 Int’s. He has never thrown more than 14 Int’s in a season. He has been in the league 8 seasons, but only played 7. He is a 4-time pro bowler and 1-time All-pro.

Montana leads the pack with four Superbowl rings. Brady has three,  Unitas has three, Two for Elway, and none for Marino.

Brady’s career isn’t done yet, but lets be sure of this, when it is all said and done, it might be thee best career ever.

Day 1

This is the beginning to a new series of thoughts. Everything I will bring forward to you in the next three to four months are only my extended experiences throughout this crazy freshman year I am having at SIUE.